Trapped!

This story is a vague recollection of one I had heard some 4 years ago. The significance of the story had not struck me then. Nor do I remember clearly how it went or how it ended. But this is how I imagine, it should have gone

Simba waited patiently for the familiar click of the lock as the keeper closed the steel cage behind him. But, there was none. He waited until the keeper had vanished into the horizon and cautiously ambled his way towards the door. Yes , he had heard right. There had been no click. The door was open!

Ever since he had been brought to this zoo three years ago, he had dreamt of this moment- the moment of escape, of freedom. But now that this moment stared him in the face, he was too afraid to look. He gently moved forward and thrust his paw against the door. It shot open. Yes! He stepped out of the cage and had barely walked two steps when thunder struck. Scared and insecure, Simba ran back into the protective covers of his cage- to its furthest, deepest and darkest corner.

He tried not to look, but the open cage door kept beckoning him- kept seducing him with promises of freedom, of hope. He started pacing up and down the cage. He remembered those good old days when chasing those darned bucks had been an act of sheer pleasure and thrill. He remembered also those depressing days he had to go through when he could not find a kill, also the sheer ecstasy and peace when he killed a fat one and knew he wouldn’t have to run after one again for the next one week. He remembered those lazy afternoons he had spent with his pack on the rocks bathing in the sun.

All of a sudden, another thunderbolt brought him back to his present. Times were good here- steady and secure. He liked the keeper. He brought him his food daily- nice and cut- and always on time. He knew a few of the other lions here too. He had struck up a good friendship with them, esp with Keira. Oh, how could he leave her? May be he could attempt to run away with her. But will she be ready? And then again will it be worth the effort. Yes, he did get awfully bored here. His tenacity had gone- little children were no longer scared when he growled. But will he be able to survive in the jungle after such a long break. Will he be able to hunt?

Yes, he had heard talks of this zoo being made more spacious, more organized. This probably meant a bigger cage, better food, maybe even some space to move about outside the cage. But outside he shall be free, completely and truly.

Several times he walked out of his cage only to be attracted inwards again by its safety and security. The clouds had parted and the full moon shone upon the pathway ahead, the pathway to freedom but a pathway with its own risks attached.

Back at the keeper’s home, he suddenly realized his folly and rushed back to the zoo. The door was shut but nothing could be seen. As he peeked inwards , he caught a glimpse of Simba- his head on the ground between his legs, deep in thought, oblivious of the flies resting on it- the look of an animal truly trapped.

Of chances and dances

Life is just so random, isn’t it? Every moment you think you have it planned and just the next instant the bubble goes pop, your delusion shatters, life throws a lightning bolt at you with full force- from direction you least expect it to.

Before college (well, first year to be more precise), I always felt I was in control of my life. Everything was so well planned, and all plans seemed to work so well. But somehow everything has changed. I just cannot feel the power in my hands any more- I am being controlled, controlled by a force so distant, so far away yet so powerful I cannot shake it off. I have tried so hard to do so- I have tried to control my life with plans and even more plans but the force always seems to win.
May be the force is not trying to control me you know, may be it is trying to help me out. May be it is actually trying to teach me what life “really” is and how I should go about leading it.

You know what? I think this might be true. Come to think of it, I had been thrown so many chances, so many opportunities during the past two years- opportunities I have used and been happy about, opportunities I have not used and regretted, opportunities I have used and regretted, opportunities I never identified.

May be the force was teaching me how to dance on chances. But may be sometimes- sometimes it is just important to let go- after all , you might dance and fall you know. But then again , may be the end result will be worth the fall. May be I should try harder from now. May be that will bring back the control on my life I have missed these past few years. I want to win. Even if I don’t, I atleast want to say I tried my best, that I used all opportunities that came my way.

But what about the chances I have missed? Can I have them back? Can I be allowed to dance again on those old tunes which I never heard but should have? Can I make up for lost opportunities? Well, lets give it a try, shall we? :)